Senility and beyond | Sunday Observer

Senility and beyond

23 April, 2017

Life is a continuous journey. Time will not stand still and therefore, we all age with every fleeing hour. Modern medicine has made tremendous progress, yet, none can stop the ageing process which ultimately culminates in death. Every human being lives with hopes and aspirations. Some are attained, some never will: that is reality. As a person reaches the final stages of mortal existence they need care, consistent love and attention. Today, as we make rapid growth as a nation, there is a silent dilemma spreading across our self-righteous nation. The elderly people are being left behind, in every tier of society amid a plethora of excuses by their families.

Caring for people has been a traditional trademark of our cultural heritage. Indeed, values can get contaminated. The pursuit of success has a way of distracting a person’s conscience. Thus, many retired people live in rejection. It is common among both, the rich and the poor. Loneliness has successfully invaded the cities and villages alike.

The issue rests in many segments of our lifestyle. One of the primary reasons for seniors having to be dependent on others is the lack of a steady income. In Sri Lanka, over the past decades seniors were not able to make a solid saving for retirement. Even if they had done so, a sudden surgery can wipe their bank accounts clean. This would only add to their trauma. The real root of this savings issue can be traced to underemployment and unhealthy wages that were not sufficient during their most active years of life- this applies to an executive, as well as a humble labourer.

Pensions of yesteryear don’t amount to much today. This is why folk try to migrate at any risk. But overseas, life does not guarantee a serene and secure retirement either, unless you went there in the 1970s! The secondary cause for rejection of the elderly, centers on their personal lifestyles. Those who married and had children are surprised when their kids get married and move away or migrate. Busy living trends, especially, in Colombo consumes time rapidly. People remain busy (one of my pastors says being too busy is Being Under Satan’s Yoke). The single seniors have to contend facing retirement alone, with unrealized dreams and feelings of regret. This makes it more important to make the right choices in life at the right age. Today’s choices yield tomorrow’s outcomes. To add to the crisis, at times in a beautiful marriage a spouse dies leaving the other alone. Ah, the perils of life in earth’s domain.

Health is wealth, is an often repeated phrase. It becomes a golden endorsement when you are old. When a senior is afflicted with infirmity it is a valid excuse for rejection. It becomes a nightmare in Sri Lanka with the lack of proper consistent care for terminal illness and issues like dementia. It is true that such parents present a risk at home, especially, if the married children are going to work. Domestic aides don’t fancy caring for the elderly. Only the very wealthy can afford to get home nursing and other on call medical facilities. Responsible medical care remains an issue for the elderly Sri Lankans. It is worse in the rural areas owing to a lack of transport in an emergency.

The attitude of nurses in dealing with seniors is quite pathetic. Nurses dealing with the elderly should realize that their natural responses to hearing and speech would be slow.

Our healthcare and other mechanisms have not been focused on sustaining a long term plan to enhance the lives of the beloved senior citizens. Basic areas like public transport are a hazard to the elderly. Travelling by bus is a ride to hell. Crossing the road is another risk as elders struggle at pedestrian crossings, with vehicles speeding by. We have expressways, but an elder can’t walk safely on the pavements!! One big shortcoming in our island is the total lack of any meaningful recreation for the elderly. Having worked in palliative care in the US, I am shocked to see that older folk basically have nothing to do when they reach 65, in terms of recreation, except read a book or watch television. The latter becomes an issue if you have impaired vision. It’s time we launched projects like ‘Meals on wheels” that operate overseas, where young volunteers deliver free food to the elders in real need.

There are seniors who migrate longing for family ties, hoping that their children will lavish love on them. After the first joyful month of eating cheese and cereal and going to the mega malls they find out that they are slowly ensnared.

They long for their spicy curries and rice. Soon the parents are relegated to in house babysitting duties. Grandfather becomes the guardian who has to walk the grandchildren to school, in summer or freezing winter, in the autumn of his life. This “babysitter” trend is taking root in Sri Lanka too. Of course, you do witness some caring families living together with due respect to the seniors.

There are many yardsticks to measure the prosperity of a developing nation. Sure we need the opulent high rise towers and electric rail systems.

The government of good governance and other allied agencies must envision a program that sustains and safeguards every senior citizen, in the city and village. Decent affordable medical care for seniors must be a prime focus. This would be a true endorsement of the four major religions that our citizens devotedly propagate. With three decades for me to become a” senior” I wonder how serene my retirement will be in sunny paradise. 

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