Imay indulge myself with a debated nostalgic moment during which my English teacher taught me the “suffixes” that are added with the root words that eventually bring about “Nouns”; I have a challenging experience with the noun ‘suffix’ “ISM” that draws the noun “Colourism”.
In the fullness of time, while watching “Skinned” – a 2015 romantic drama, directed by Lisa Raye McCoy and Avery O. Williams and “Charcoal” – a 2017 short film by Francesca Andre. I find that I have not yet been able to draw a blank on the noun colourism where I have a face like a wet weekend; the noun in hand that makes me personally terrified is a lump in my throat. While feeling blue over the classification of colourism, should I contemplate and reduce to tears? I tell myself “OK, no biggie; no fret and sweat”.
Difficulties of combatting prejudice and bigotry, predominantly based on the colour of skin, have startled and astounded the lifestyle of countless number of women who are dark skinned; they face with issues of tremendous hard feelings in their pursuit of love and romance.
They find that they are not held in high esteem as much as their lighter skinned counterparts. They may complain that their dating pool, courting the group of potential people they can date is constricted and compressed due to certain things as erratic and autocratic as the phrase that says, “Don’t get too big for your boots”.
Cold shoulder
I too cut my teeth on the matter of being given the cold shoulder for being dark skinned. You may have heard of the soothing and consoling phrase that says “being pretty for a dark skinned woman”; despite the numerous times that I have been all in years, it took a coon’s age for me to realise as to why mine is not qualified as a form of an apology for my dark-skin.
I know a dark skinned girl who is as cute as a button in a new dress. She talks a mile a minute on her synopsis about “A long walk to Freedom”; Nelson Mandela’s celebrated novel and it reduces her to tears. She recalls the famous expression that says; “to hold a candle to the devil”.
She brings back my wistful affection from my childhood. I was not a babe in the woods. However, I adored myself being adoringly called “dusky”, and being too rather a dusky maiden. Steadily and deliberately, I fell head over heels in love with myself for having lustrous brunette tresses.
During such times, light skin was a blessing, grace and invocation above every influential force; notably for women in particular exclude a relatively large population of the demography.
I rapturously and blithely turned a blind eye on the fact that there wasn’t anything that had contradictory views on the aspect of my skin colour. I feel that I have apparently bumped into a highly challenging patches of ignorance and misunderstanding, and for which I have a heavy heart on the hawkish stance of colonialism and white supremacy.
My research indicates that a greater number of dark skinned women get accustomed to the arduous search for the best makeup that is able to make a remarkable and visible change on the darker skin tone. Dating even under these circumstances is a dilemma.
Short-lived attraction
You come to know that your friends with a lighter skin tone grab the attention of the people around more than you do. I also have heard of my darker skinned chums sharing with me that some men get attracted to them but ultimately shun giving it a sincere chase.
Some men declare that their love for darker skinned women and simultaneously erase the possibility of tying the knot with the darker skinned. However, becoming a niche with a prestigious symbol in society is a finger lacking that adds an abundance of self-worth and prestige in a society where the Victorian driven majority of men being interested in women with lighter skin tones.
Conquering the adversities of the colour bias community, you become firm and steady; you make a strong suggestion to yourself in rising from the ashes and eliminating the darkness in your sky of weeping heart. You begin to forgive and feel sympathetic for the folk which are fatally brainwashed by the ruins of colonialism. Albeit, it has often been an uphill battle, you nail it in the best possible way.
