Amaani Munaf started writing as a form of coping mechanism. She first started out with poetry, where writing saved her from bottling up her pain as she dealt with bullying and discrimination since she was around thirteen years old.
“It was a means of letting everything out. I was a child and didn’t tell anyone about my struggles,” she said. These experiences met with several other sentiments later in Amaani’s life, which inspired in her the story of Nevaeh, a girl who overcomes abuse, bruises, fear, grief and betrayal and ultimately conquers and soars above her own trauma unapologetically.
Today Amaani holds in her hand her very first novel, ‘On the Brink of Insanity’ published by The Jam Fruit Tree Publications, that narrates this powerful story of bravery and strength.
After Amaani was transferred from a mixed school to a strict and rather conservative All Girls’ school, she recalled being the subject of criticism and judgement. As a result, she underwent constant bullying from several narrow-minded classmates and even teachers, simply for her less conservative and rather radical and open-minded personality.
She was isolated and was always found reading in the library. Amaani’s academics declined and her grades dropped as the bullying and discrimination kept building onto her and consequently weighed down on her.
“The school sent me for counselling too, thinking I was having family problems. Little did they know or choose to understand that what I really had were school problems. But they didn’t realise what they were doing was wrong, they thought they were correct,” recalled Amaani.
Good at writing
However, writing was her confidante and companion throughout these difficult experiences. When she started posting her writing on social media, the positive feedback she received made her realise that she was good at writing, which she later turned into her career. Today, she is also a talented content writer at Blue Tangerine, Dubai and a full-time journalist at The Morning.
‘On the Brink of Insanity’ began to emerge in 2019, and it took around five years for the author to complete it. Amaani had noticed that the tendency to place blame on the victim has become all too common in our society, especially among many women whom she has personally spoken with and encountered.
“Their tragic experiences really resonated with me,” she said. “It was those experiences that ultimately inspired the direction of my writing and also the main motivation behind this book.” Amaani is the kind of writer who imagines herself in the shoes of the characters and realistically empathises with what they are going through. This way she believes that she can connect deeply with these characters and emotions and do justice to their experiences.
Amaani mentioned how she went through several obstacles and challenges in her personal life which delayed the publication of her book as well. “In cultures like ours, people have their own rules on how to dress, how to walk, what a woman should do and how they should live. I went against almost every one of them,” said Amaani. Through the book, Amaani wants her readers to ask for help without guilt. She further explained how in societies like ours, victim blaming is a major issue and how unnecessary and impractical details determine a girl’s purity which also oppresses and dangerously affects their mental health and life.
Memorable moment
Amaani shared that the most memorable and exciting moment throughout her journey as an author was her book launch. Amaani recalled how amazing it felt to be among friends and a whole bunch of strangers who were interested in her book.
“It was packed to the point we ran out of seats,” Amaani recalled fondly.
She also mentioned how it was her best friend who helped her choose the title for her book, who asked her to write about those who lost their lives due to the trauma of sexual abuse. Amaani believes that the title, ‘On the Brink of Insanity’ seemed fitting to her novel because it showcases how the protagonist is on the edge and almost on the verge of giving up on herself. But ultimately, no matter how challenging, painful and overwhelming it feels, she chooses to rise from the ashes and continue with her life. Thus becoming an inspiration and an epitome to similar survivors out there.
Amaani hopes that her book would help those who need the assurance and faith that there is always more to life despite the trauma, pain and abuse that people unfortunately go through. “Taking your life is not an option. Reach out for help. You may not be able to trust the people in your life or even those who are close to you, but there will always be a third person or a professional who would be able to help you out,” she said.
“It’s always better to be kind and always choose your words correctly. You never know what the person next to you is going through.”
