Although we think we are normal people, we have some bizarre habits. However, we are not willing to accept them because we are unable to recognise them. Psychologists say weirdness itself is quite normal and it makes us human. Unfortunately, it is not easy to identify behaviours that may harm others.
Some of us can remember what we had done as children, but we cannot remember where we left the office keys. If you are in your 50s or 60s, you will suspect that they are signs of early senility. In fact, we lose our short-term memory as we age. However, it is no sign of senility. Long-term memories are accessible now because you had paid much attention to them in the past. JoAnna Wood, a research assistant in San Antonio, says you tend to forget what is stored in your short-term memory because you are thinking about other important domestic or office matters.
Today we are leading a hectic life and our income is not sufficient to settle our utility bills. With such problems uppermost in your mind it is quite natural for you to forget minor issues.
Short-term memory
Our short-term memory uses a different part of the brain. Although we try to keep the short-term memory intact, our fast-paced life does not allow it to happen. One solution is to keep your office keys in a prominent place where you can see them. Never change the location. If you do so, you will be able to locate the office keys without much hassle. One of my colleagues used to sing the same song every day. Even while working she used to sing. As the song was uppermost in her mind, she could not concentrate on her work. In addition, she used to tap her feet on the floor leaving others with two possible conclusions. One is that her behaviour is quite natural because almost everyone has similar experiences. The other is that she has a psychological problem.
Some people are worried about orderliness or neatness in their activities and those of others. If they see someone else’s workplace in disarray, they will try to put things in order. There are those who try to correct the way people dress or walk. By doing so, they are not doing a service to others. Their behaviour shows that they have a classic Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). According to a Harvard psychiatrist, everyone has a few OCD habits and you cannot really be too success-oriented without them. Although a neat table and flawless letter show a person’s quality, you have no right to impose your compulsive urges on them. If you cannot abstain from doing so, you need help from a psychologist.
Counselling session
I met an elderly man who was even afraid to look at a picture of a cobra in a book or newspaper. If he saw such a picture, he would not be able to sleep peacefully. At a counselling session he was shown the pictures of snakes.
Later he was taken to a zoo where he could see live snakes including cobras. His gradual exposure to snakes made him to realise that he was suffering from a phobia. He was made to understand that there were more dangerous things in the environment than snakes. It soon dawned on him that electricity wires and speeding vehicles are more dangerous than snakes. Such phobias can be conquered by gradual exposure to the things a person is afraid to look at. In a typical experiment a person was asked to keep a snake in a cage in his room. He was also taken to a village infested with snakes. Snakes are found even in big cities.
You may have seen people talking to themselves. Is this a mild form of schizophrenia? Psychologists say talking to yourself is quite normal. It may be that you rehearse what you are going to tell someone else. Recent studies show that students who think out loud perform better in examinations. However, try to avoid talking to yourself in public places.
Sometime we see people tapping and drumming their fingers on various objects. Is this a sign of madness? According to psychologists, tapping your fingers on a surface might give you a temporary relief until you find the root cause of a problem. There are some people who tap their fingers due to excess energy. Such people should take up jogging, running or drumming.
Many of us are suffering from stage fright. As a result we are unable to address even a small gathering of people. The best remedy is to join the nearest Toastmasters Club where you will be trained to speak without fear or shyness. I have met several people who have got over their stage fright by becoming members of the Toastmasters Club.
Sometimes we are swept away by emotions. When this happens we face what is called ‘cold-fish moments.’ Some people start crying on such occasions. When you cry you release your pent-up emotions. However, crying on every occasion will not produce good results. Take responsibility for your feelings and address your emotions. It is the only way to deal with emotions. Even if you cry occasionally you are not crazy. Great men also cry simply because they are human.
Barack Obama
Men crying in public is one thing, but a President who is moved to tears in front of the entire nation is quite another. Former U.S. President Barack Obama’s eyes were filled with tears when he said the following while addressing the nation: “Our unalienable right to life and liberty and the pursuit of happiness – those rights were stripped from college students in Blacksburg and Santa Barbara and from high schoolers at Columbine and from first graders in Newtown.”
Crying is a natural human emotion and there is nothing wrong when a man cries. In fact, crying can be a very healthy way to express difficult feelings and process emotions. Crying releases oxytocin and endorphins which can help ease physical and emotional pain.
