Nirmaladevi Ramachandran:
A friendship so meaningful
Our first lady Commissioner General of Inland Revenue, in her own pragmatic matter of fact way, decided to leave us on September 21, 2017, maintaining Dignity of Life by saying, “no, thank you” to modern medical technology, with her Medical Professor son Dr. Sudarshan standing steadfastly beside her to dutifully carry out her every request, including a very private farewell.
Together we had discussed a dignified departure, and Nimo, you faced it first, so bravely, providing an indelible inspiration for all of us.
From a tribute by a colleague we learn that when you retired, “she held a record of the Revenue Collection being 20% of GDP - the highest ever for the past one and a half decades of the 20th Century.’’ We, her friends, never knew that - that was our friend Nimo. However, I do remember requesting her to reconsider her decision to retire, because “our country needs you, and we need to boast about you!’’ This was an Officer who had politely refused a request from Higher Authority, and when the expected repercussions did not happen, respected the Higher Authority for evermore. This is the only instance that I happen to know - strict confidentiality with respect to her office work was the norm.
Values of Justice, Honesty, and Fair-play and bravely facing the risk of possible adverse repercussions - that was Nirmala Ramachandran.
One chapter in her first book [one of three], Hindu heritage titled unacceptable practices, alarmed me so much on her behalf, that I called her with a reproach saying, ‘’was this really necessary, these are ancient practices, why provoke people?’’- her curt response was, ‘’what is wrong is wrong and must be stated,’’ in no uncertain terms, I wish to add.
Once a phone call inviting me to join her and her husband Dr. Rama on a house-boat which they had booked on Dal-Lake in Srinagar got me an unforgettable response - when I said, ‘’is it safe to go to Kashmir? ‘’ her realistic response was, ‘’ is any place more dangerous than Colombo?’’[this was 2008] of course I went - there was no longer a reason not to do so - we had an enchanting holiday seeing the newly established Tulip-fields as well.
‘’and a youth said, Speak to us of friendship and,
He answered saying,
Your friend is your needs answered………..
When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the ‘nay’ in your own mind,
nor do you withhold the ‘aye’
and when you part from your friend you grieve not,
For that which you love most maybe clearer in his absence,
as the mountain for the climber is clearer from the plain’’
(The Prophet by Kalil Gibran)
When one parts from a friend as defined in this insightful poem, how can one not grieve for oneself?---to be able to talk without fear or favour about all manner of topics, including very sensitive ones.
Almost every Sunday morning, conversations enriched with my friend’s widely read background and flavoured with her Wodehousian sense of humour……left me with a void that cannot be filled, how can one not grieve…….
Our schoolgirl dreams of travelling this wondrous world together came true and for that, we were constantly thankful, even though our travelling days were over….as Dr. Rama once declared, it is worthwhile being born simply to travel………
Your spiritual background and mine, both assure us that we shall meet again---a friendship so close and meaningful could not have happened by chance.
Therefore dear NIMO, this is AU REVOIR, not goodbye.
Chandramani Thenuwara
********
Janaka Bogollagama:
Model employer
It’s hard to believe that Janaka, a man full of life, the joys of spring, joie de virve and generosity of spirit has been gone for seven years. I was very close to this family for many years, shared in all their moments of joy, sorrow, and celebration.
When he was struck down with this fatal illness, I spent much time in hospital talking to him in his room, sometimes on my own, often with Sunetra, his devoted wife, who had to be persuaded to go home and rest, from time to time.
In the time that we were on our own, Janaka’s main subjects of conversation were his worries about his children, his wife, he was concerned how they would fare without his presence which was their constant symbol of stability.
He had provided for them, more than abundantly, but he knew they had to be guided on using their vast resources wisely and guiding their own destinies, with wisdom, business acumen and foresight.
Next to his family, his main concern was Prime Minister Ranil Wickremesinghe, he was one like me and a handful of others, whose loyalty to the PM stood firmly and surely right through, unmoved by the shifting sands of victory and defeat.
I recall an instance when I was sitting by him, when Ranil came to see him in hospital, he was very ill but his face lit up with joy and he forgot his own pain and worries about his family while he talked to his distinguished visitor.
Janaka was a rare being, always thinking of others and how he could help them to weather the storms and tempests of life.
He had absolutely no deviousness and never played both sides against the middle.
He was a model employer, deeply loved by all his employees, who he cared for as if they were his own family and they adored and respected him in return.
His generosity to the underprivileged in all categories, the needy, injured soldiers, families of those killed in battle, victims of the Tsunami, to temples in all parts of the country, in addition to his hometown, Kurunegala and the NWP have been of great magnitude. His death has and always will be a great loss to the UNP.
He never spared time or expense if the party was in need. For me too, it is a loss of a friend who is difficult to replace.
He would call me often to ask my advice on personal matters and drop in with mangoes and coconuts for me.
His love of sports was perhaps the inspiration for his unerring sense of justice and fair play towards all beings. To find these qualities today, in whatever field one might think of is like finding a needle in a haystack!
Janaka was at school at Ananda College and was Public Schools Champion in tennis.
He played this game right through to the end till his illness compelled him to give it up.
He was President of the Badminton Association in the North Western Province, President of the Kurunegala Club for 15 years and the only person from the outstation to be President of the SLTA.
He was also President of the Wayamba Chamber of Commerce. Although a devout Buddhist, as a benefactor to one and many, he thought far beyond the narrow peripheries of caste, race or creed.
He has helped families in Trincomalee, and later did the same after the tsunami. He sponsored almost all sports events in Kurunegala and built seven temples in the NWP, but never rejected pleas from Churches and other religious organizations for help, all of which were given with a kind smile. Janaka thrived on freedom and was a free spirit.
His life has left a gaping vacuum in the lives of his family and all who loved him.
I can think of no better words than those of Christina Rossetti, which I think Janaka would be saying to his family and all those who loved him.
‘Remember me when I am gone away
Gone far away to the silent land.
When you can no more hold me by the hand, nor I half turning to go, yet turning to stay.
Remember me when no more day by day, you tell me of our future that you planned.
Only remember me, you understand. It will be too late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while and afterwards remember, do not grieve.
For if the darkness and corruption leave, a vestige of the thoughts that I once had. Better by far you should forget and smile, than you should remember and be sad.’
- Ilica Malkanthi Karunaratne
********
A priceless gem
Bliss Supreme to Madam Thiloka sundari!
Late Principal and popular Math
ematics teacher of Sangamitta
Balika Vidyalaya, Galle
Today your obedient past pupils
gather at your revered memory
To pay their respects, sense of loy
alty and gratitude.
Dear Madam Thilokasundari!
You were really a beacon
Who could guide the destinies of many a student
On the straight path of Virtue and Wisdom
To reach the desired goal in view!
Indeed it is a deep debt of gratitude
That the modern youth owe you
For the invaluable service that you
rendered
In the cause of Buddhist education.
Our revered Madam Thilokasundari
Kariyawasam!
You were a priceless gem among
womankind
Inculcating the value of selfless
service
Into the minds of the young
generation, as custodians of
Buddhist heritage
Instructing, guiding and serving the
masses as a Kalyana Mithra,
Though you left your mortal frame
in this land of ours
The great and admirable service you
rendered in the field of education
Will smell sweet for all times
spreading its fragrance far and wide.
- Jayasumana Robertson